Take one large packet of digestive biscuits, remove six, crush the rest and mix with 2/3rds of a 250g block of butter. Press into base of an 11 inch pie dish.
Next, take 400g cream cheese, one can condensed milk, and juice and zest of one fat round lemon. Blitz until smooth, pour onto the biscuit layer. Chill
Pause to thoroughly lick cheesecake bowl.
Put 1/2 a pint double cream into a saucepan over a low heat. Add 150g plain chocolate and stir until melted. Drizzle in a good glug or so of Baileys, to taste.
Pour over the chilled cheesecake layer, gently so it doesn't get mixed in.
Slice strawberries and put them on the chocolate layer. Leave gaps for M&Ms, but then realise you accidentally bought the peanut M&Ms and you don't like them. Leave gaps as decoration.
*Make your mother (who has assisted with pouring, slicing and strawberry placement) carry it round to Grannie and Grandad's house. Chill in their fridge whilst eating roast pork and asparagus.
Slice and spoon to serve. Taste. Decide chocolate layer is too grown up for you. Watch, baffled, as the adults all fight for it.
*this step optional.