You are going to Helen House tomorrow for respite. It is not necessary for you to become ill in order to go. Pleased as I am that you enjoy it there, I would prefer it if you could cease and desist from the sudden lurgies.
I tidied today. Your efforts to redecorate were not appreciated.
Whilst we're at it, how can you sound that rattly, be in that much distress, but not give me any decent goo to slurp? And how can you go from outstandingly bouncy at Brownies to cough rattle and roll in the 2 minute walk home? We have central heating, you don't need to become your own furnace either. And if this is going to be a repeat of Sunday, could you either make as quick a recovery with no recurrence or else give us a clue as to what's going on tomorrow when we get to see a doctor?
Dear Little Princess. This is not a competition. Screaming until you vomit because you want me to stop Mog's nebuliser is unnecessary. Oh, and how come you can go a week on holiday with no leaks, but have three separate leaks last night? Neither this nor the puking is proper princessly behaviour. And the choking on a lump of cheese earlier was unappreciated - if you want me to swing you upside down please just ask next time.
Which brings me to my proclamation. You are both going into Helen House tomorrow. This is for respite, not for illness. I am going away. You both need to be well. So just stop it now.
Also; I am tired. And did I mention that I'm going away, for the first time in I think four years? Sickness is banned.