Increasing the feline population

The girls were invited to a birthday party today. The invitations arrived weeks ago, we replied in good time, I noted it in my diary and then promptly lost the invitations. So, yesterday I thought I'd better find out what time it was and check which church hall we needed to find.

And received the always welcome news that it was fancy dress. Ooops.

Take one rather nice remnant of furry fabric. Cut into three strips, one 2 inches wide, one 8 inches wide, and one wide enough to become a tabard. Cut the smallest strip in half, and fold both corners down like this.
Fold the second strip in half and stitch it like this. You can't see it terribly well but there's a nice little curve on the bottom corner.
Take the tabard sized strip, double it over, then fold in half lengthwise. Fold the hood in half and use it to hack out a hole in the middle cut a shallow diamond for the neck.
Sew the hood to the tabard. Find a small square of cream fabric, cut it in half and glue it to the two black triangles. Lose the camera. Fold the triangles so the cream is inside and they stand up. Mutter imprecations for having lost the camera. Pin the ears to the hood in a thin tuck about 2 inches from the front of the hood. Bend pins. Hand sew ears to hood, developing blisters on forefingers from the pressure of pushing the needle through 7 layers of fabric. Tear playroom apart looking for camera.

Stitch both sides of the tabard down, leaving holes for the arms. Find camera. Resist urge to kick the cat.

Find a pair of old tights, and stuff with a pair of leggings which have been sitting in the mending pile for three years. Lay next to tabard to prove outfit is definitely cat and not bat. Dress small child in white tights and white long-sleeved jumper. Pull tabard over head of said small child, and post tail through hand-hold at the back of the wheelchair.
Very cute! Celebrate for two minutes until you realise you don't have a costume for your other child either. Bang head against wall until you see red. The red reminds you that you have a red cord pinafore dress and a red crocheted poncho. Dress child in a pair of white tights and a white long sleeved jumper (spot the theme here?). Rethread neck cord on poncho to give artificial hood. Find toy moses basket belonging to child currently dressed as a cat, and thread it through second child's stiff fingers. Arrange birthday child's present in basket with a scarf in manner intended to suggest cakes and goodies for a sick grandmother.

Pose child carefully. Realise camera has disappeared again. Swear. Find alternative camera, snap perfect photograph, then realise you now have no way of plugging said alternative camera into computer, having lost cable months ago.

Take out mobile phone, attempt to line both children up together, give up in despair. Leave, late, for the party. Receive admiration for costumes and hold disconcerting conversation with woman who turns out to have been your music teacher in the GCSE years. Realise she looks several years younger than you now.

Survive Enjoy party. Watch cat-child dance with 5 spidermen and 3 princesses, as Little Red Riding Hood child coughs quietly in a corner watching the rest of the action. Realise that you are no longer embarrassed by your smallest child's ability to be first to sit down at the table, and last to leave, a good 10 minutes after the other children. Smile sweetly as same child flattens several small children in her rush to grab a party bag as they are brought out. Debate whether bad manners is excused by the fact child is finally anticipating what happens at Birthday parties. Shelve complex thoughts for later.

Get home. Find camera. Discover suspicious odour emanating from smallest child, and disappear to fix it. Bring camera to take photo of larger child, and discover that evening carer has let herself into the house and, in a fit of super-keenness, has lifted said child onto bench and stripped costume off in order to give her a shower.

Place camera on top of computer in order to avoid losing it again. Post small child into bed and prepare armchair for larger child who is currently unable to lie down.

Upload pictures and realise how few decent ones there are. Decide to post them anyway.

Tia