Friday 3 July 2020

Day 109

Why today? Why not? Today isn’t a particularly special day, nothing distinguishing it from any of the previous 30. We had our fabulous morning Carer to give my girl a shower. I have cut out four heart shaped pieces of bread for her to make peanut butter sandwiches, my boy has had his bleach bath in front of the washing machine and I am on coffee number three.

From Monday, we are allowed to form a bubble. A shielding bubble, a month after the same right was extended to non-shielding single adult households. On Tuesday, our bubble friends come down, and our two households officially become one. We will have company, indoors, without having to maintain distance.

It has been a very very long 109 days. In the last month, we have gradually lowered our shield a little. We have had respite nurses. I have had 2.5 hours without either child. We have started taking short walks again, and found a mostly empty country house garden. We have had a few visitors to our back garden, and are deeply deeply thankful that the weather has been so kind to us. Each child has had one hospital visit.

Enough to see that the world is still out there. But enough too, to see how the world out there has changed. We have another month safe inside our shielding bubble, before we can ease ourselves back into this strange new world. We won’t be racing to rejoin it. A is determined she will not be entering shops. She has declared for herself safe and unsafe zones and people. Whilst we would love to be amongst the first worshippers once church reopens, realistically, we will be live streaming for a good long while.

And for today, we are here. My daughter inside, thinking about an art project which will no doubt cover table and floor with more cut out bits of foam and paper, glitter and glue, without ever reaching a finished product. But it is the process, not the product, she enjoys. My son and I outside, he in the swing, I enjoying the heady scent of jasmine, honeysuckle and lavender as I swing him. We have no particular aims for today. My goals for the day are very small - to finish it with everyone in bed, fully fed, and the house at least no more trashed than it was this morning. The children are happy, we are all well, and the end of this phase of living is close. It is enough for now.


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